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Wednesday, November 30, 2005
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Nothing. |
| No matter how perfect you try to be, what if it's never enough? It will never be good enough, not when you're dealing with impossible odds. When you believe in what you're fighting for, no matter how impossible things might seem, you reason out that hope is all you need. But hope can only take you so far. Sometimes the heartache is just too much. Everyone has a limit. You fight with every bone in your body. Endure pain that no one should ever have to experience. You cry the the most sorrowful tears. Willingly make the hardest of sacrifices. Pray the most sincere prayers. What else is there to do? When it seems it is your destiny to fail, nothing you do will ever be enough. God knows I tried, but I need to rest now. You will always be loved. I promise. |
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Who? Me, a scholar? |
 Looking back at when I first enrolled in Architecture, I was partly asking myself if it was a good idea. Sure, I loved the whole idea of designing buildings, doing drafting work and being artsy-fartsy in general, but I kept asking myself if it was something I would be good at. The doubts were numerous and the odds were stacked against me, but I took the risk and vowed to do my best. The first few days/weeks were tough, but I knew deep inside that this was something that was meant to be. A love for this strange and mysterious course was developing inside of me. Despite the continuous trials, I knew that I found what I was looking for. As time went by, the feeling became stronger, the drive was growing and the results were showing. Now, after one semester, I found out that my performance was good enough to garner a 100% scholarship. With a GPA of 92.00, it's pretty safe to say that I did pretty well. For the record, I'm very happy with this whole Architecture route my life is taking. I'm loving what I'm doing and I feel focused. This is the path God has put me on and I'm gonna take it. listening to: Finch - A Song for You |
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Kalabasa Man |
The wise Ninja Grandmaster, Masaaki Hatsumi felt it was important to start my training almost immediately after my birth. The moment I could start to eat semi-solid baby food, he gave specific instructions to my mother to feed me a strict diet consisting of vitamin-A rich winter squash, carrots and sweet potatoes. I used to remember my mom would say that squash was one of my favorite foods when I was a baby. Now I understand why. It was all in preparation for my life as a ninja. In my younger days, I've always found it strange that I have extremely keen eyesight and the ability to notice very subtle details... A really far off roadsign, really small fine print, etc. After a while, I noticed my ability to see in low-light situations. I took advantage of this, especially during the time when I was really fond of reading. There was a point in time that I read everything I could get my hands on. Comics, Hardy Boys books, encyclopedias, Nintendo game manuals, whatever. Usually, I wouldn't stop reading until I finished the whole book, or at least a considerable amount of it. That lead me to start reading under the covers with just a busted, old flashlight. Sometimes, either mom or dad would come in and find me up way past my bedtime and get pissed at me, telling me I'd mess up my eyes. When I wouldn't stop, they bought me a lamp to put near my bed. Last night, I bought some supplies for my VisTech2 class. On the way home, I guess I dropped my brush, only noticing when upon my arrival at the house. I was pretty pissed off, but had other things to worry about. Anyway, about an hour later, I was walking through the dark back to the jeepney stop. To my surprise, I found my missing brush along the unpaved portion of the road. It was pretty amazing that I was still able to see it under those conditions. Props to GM Masaaki Hatsumi, you the man! I'll be forever grateful. listening to: Ice Cube - You Can Do It |
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Back in Black |
| Felt some creative juice flowing, so I decided to try playing around with the template for my Blogspot blog. There's still alot I want to do, but it's a start. What do you guys think? Lemme know, leave a comment, please! Anyway, off to bed for me! listening to: Nature Sounds - Ocean Waves |
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Pushing the Limits |
| Yesterday was hell. Well, both Sunday and Monday would have been complete crap if not for Sunday's event (which I'll talk about later). Sunday morning, from midnight 'til around 5:30am, I couldn't sleep because I was excited about something and also because I had to finish my plate in Design 2. Well, I fell asleep at 5:30am, then woke up at 7:00am, I wanted to get my work done while I had time. I continued to work as I waited for Kay. So it was about 3:00pm that Kay arrived and I was able to take a long time-out. At around 10am, I continued my work and didn't stop until around 6:30pm because I had to take a bath and get ready for class. That's right, no sleep for me, and on a Monday. Monday's are hell days. 7:30am until 7:30pm. When I got home I was exhausted. I had a quick dinner then fell asleep. Imagine, me, asleep at 8:30pm. I woke up at around 9 or 10 this morning. I spent most of the day in bed as well. This is really bad. I don't know how I'm gonna survive 4 more years of this. Let's just hope that my schedule won't be as bad in the following semesters. listening to: Fort Minor - Petrified |
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After 365 days... |
| There are times you wish for something so badly that you'd hope and pray so hard for it. You do so despite the fact that fate gives you every indication that you'd be a fool to ever hope for that one thing to happen. Why would you continue to go on hoping when failure haunts your every step? Why do I continue to keep on hoping? Heck, I don't know. It's difficult to describe the feeling that urges me to go on, that feeling that grips my very soul. Despite all the pain and tears, it gives you the will to fight for your dream. I couldn't imagine putting myself through this if I didn't truly desire for my dream to come true. Desire, love, passion... the fuel for a life well lived. I guess it applies to everything you do. Work, studying, relationships, sports... there has to be that feeling inside of you, that love for what you do. Today is supposed to be a special day. I've been hoping it would still be special for the past few months now. As of now, it looks like a big maybe. Or we could just have ourselves a plain old shitty day, just like old times. Whatever. listening to: Lost Prophets - Lucky You |
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My Weekend in Manila |
| After my afternoon class on Friday, I had to head straight home in order to get my stuff for Manila. Adie and Mel picked me up at NAIA, then we proceeded to Glorietta to meet up with some of the other pROsins. As usual, we met in McCafe and chatted for quite a while before heading to Wendy's for a bite to eat. Then we hung out for a while, discussing stuff assassins discuss. Later that night Shabs let me crash at his place. The next morning, I met up with Sam and we went to her house in Alabang for breakfast. After breakfast she picked out her outfit for the wedding before we left for Batangas. It was a two hour drive before we got there, spent reminiscing our college days and just catching up on stuff. The venue for the wedding was beautiful. It was set up next to an infinity pool overlooking the ocean. There were probably less than 100 people at the wedding, so it was just an intimate little gathering. The guests were in what Kevin called "formal beach attire", which for the guys meant: linen shirts, khakis and leather sandals. The ceremony itself was really short and sweet, the pastor was cool and shared alot of useful (and sometimes funny) points to Kevin and Anna. Then we proceeded to the club house area for the reception. Again, it was really nice, not overly formal like most weddings. Throughout the reception, there was a slide show pictures of the couple. After dinner there were the typical reception "procedures" like the tossing of the bouquet and the slicing of the cake, but then they had a fun game where we would be grouped by table and had to answer some multiple choice trivia about Kevin and Anna. Our table was doing really well, but we ended up only getting 3rd place. Sam and I left the reception at around 9, it was another long drive back to Alabang. It was funny because we almost got lost twice along the way. Anyway, it was around 11:30 when we arrived at their house. Sam let me stay in their guest room for the night. Thoroughly exhausted, I went straight to bed. The next morning, Sam dropped me off at Pancake House right near Alabang Town Center where I met up with Dein for breakfast. I totally binged that morning and had: blueberry pancakes, a perfect match meal (country sausages, hashbrowns, toast, scrambled eggs and hot tea), orange juice and a side order of bacon. Yum yum! Then we headed over to Dein's house where he showed me some funny StarWars stuff on his computer and I attempted to play Hitman 2 on his PS2 (I'll stick to the pc version,thank you). Then we went to the SM just a stone's throw away from their house and walked around until around 2:30, when Maan arrived from Tagaytay. We stopped by the American Boulevard shop and I picked up a bunch of novelty shirts. We spent quite a bit of time in the shop when I realized that I had to get to the airport and FAST! My check-in time was barely an hour away. Dein and Maan helped me get a cab, telling the driver that I had to get to the airport lickety-split. He made like an F1 racer and got me there just in the nick of time. I sped to the check-in counter and the guy there told me that my flight would be delayed for about 2 hours. Ugh, what a load of crap. Anyway, I got a free dinner complements of PAL, and I waited for my flight. By 9 that night, I was out cold in my bed at home. listening to: Lionel Richie - The Only One |
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Back to School again |
| Wow, it's been a while again... Last week was kind of crazy, school started again and it threw me for a loop. My schedule is really weird, Mondays and Wednesdays are packed, Tuesdays and Thursdays are empty, Fridays are only half-days. Mondays are the worst. We start at 7:30am and get out at 7:30pm. I don't know how insane it's gonna get later on in the semester, especially with the major subjects. *shudders* The environment has changed a bit, Section A and a large number of us from Section B were bunched together into one section. Anyway, most of my classmates are pretty cool, but there seem to be some people who don't get along with other people, but I guess that's how they are. On my part, I don't have any problem with any of my new classmates, so everything is ok for me. Just yesterday, we got this week long project for Design 2, almost identical to our final exam, but with even more design requirements. We even have to make our own layout for the house, which is a first for us. I think I'm gonna collapse. listening to: Thursday - Tomorrow I'll Be You |
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I have a new cousin! |
| Before I forget! Ladies and gentlemen, lets all gather 'round and welcome Miss Carmela Isabel Sta. Ana into the world! She's my brand new baby cousin. Born just this Halloween, at 6:02 PM, she's a healthy 6 lbs. 15 oz. and 50 cm long. She's a big girl! Congratulations to my tito Boy and tita Sharlene for the new addition to the family! listening to: The Used - Let It Bleed |
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© Timothy James Tupas 2005 All rights reserved
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